Proof that Twilight fans are crazier than Black Friday shoppers

As a sort of warm-up to the Black Friday expedition, I somehow managed to convince Jane that we should go see New Moon opening weekend- in Times Square. That turned out to be some real insanity that could have easily resulted in someone being trampled to death. Unfortunately I only had my little digital camera to record the scene (which I also forgot to charge before leaving the house), but you can definitely get a sense of what it was like.

And just to be honest for a second- I really can’t comprehend why everyone is so crazy about this series. I have not read the books, nor do I intend to (since reading Nicholas Spark’s The Notebook a few years ago any romance driven literature makes me want to vomit), but I doubt they’re any better than those in the Goosebumps series. The only thing the viewers seemed to be excited about were the male leads, and interest in Edward quickly faded after Lautner took off his shirt in a scene which could’ve easily come straight out of a porno movie.

Overall, I feel like they put to much powder on Edward’s face this time around, Bella was a huge slut/bitch, Ashley Greene’s wardrobe was terrible, and it was all around juvenile and, for lack of better word, stupid. Redeeming factors included Bella’s school friends for some much needed comic relief (and I am totally excited for Anna Kendrick to prove her Twilight role is underwritten after people see Up in the Air) and Dakota Fanning who looked like a child dominatrix.

I also don’t understand how all these extra Cullen family members and random vampires can be “Twilight Stars” given some of them have, like, 3 total minutes of screen time (Nikki Reed, Kellan Lutz, that chick who plays Victoria).

Oh, and I was totally on Team Jacob, btw.

This whole vampire thing is in itself a little crazy. I know we are all part of the zeitgeist, but what about it encourages a fascination these guys? Last year there was True Blood, Twilight, Let The Right One In, even Conall’s friend wrote a script about a possible vampire (and he was in Romania, which probably makes his the most authentic of the bunch). This year there’s Vampire Diaries, in January there’s Daybreakers and Cam Gigandet is being recycled in some new vampire movie Priest due out later next year. It’s getting to be a little much, but I don’t see people growing tired of it until the final Twilight installment is released. With Benicio Del Toro starring in Wolfman, I’m happy to see that werewolves will get a larger slice of pop culture fascination as well.

For anyone who’s become a vampire-fan on the basis of the Twilight films/books, you should check out older (and better) movies about the undead. I would recommend Herzog’s Nosferatu: Phantom der Nacht, Coppola’s Dracula, and Interview with the Vampire as my top three. And Jack Nicholson will always be my favorite werewolf because, well, he’s fucking Jack Nicholson.